Becoming a savior for your younger self

I deeply agree with this statement, that you become whoever would have saved a younger version of yourself.

The version of yourself that needed saving and no one appeared.

I want to become that someone for someone else.

That is why I write.

Finding the words

For the longest time, I never had the words.

Never had the words to explain my feelings, my thoughts, my experiences, my identity.

Not having the words for those things is deeply damaging.

Knowing that you are something but not knowing what that something is means that you think that you're broken.

That something is wrong with you.

It hurts.

It hurts a lot.

So I seek to find the words.

By writing on this blog, I find the words, I find the words for myself and continue searching for words that will explain my experience.

Plurality. Trans. Sapphic. Autistic. ADHD. Neurodivergent. Depression. OCD. Anxiety. Bipolar.

I write to seek out the people who are like me.

People who fit into this weird intersectional box that is a neurotic queer neurodivergent woman.

With the hope that I can save someone like myself.

Someone younger. Someone without the words.

Someone hurting like we did.

Someone who's in pain.

I hope that they find comfort in my words.

I hope that they see themselves.

I want them to see me and have hope.

Hope that they will survive.

Hope that they will one day feel safe and happy and loved.

Hope that they will one day find the words for themselves.